Lessons...

To say God has done a mighty work in my life during this whole time, would be a major understatement. There are so many things that God has taught me during this time. Lessons learned through pain are hard to learn, but these are the lessons that last the longest. I have already shared my heart on the situation at hand. Now, please allow me to share my heart about the great things God has done.

The most important lesson that I have learned is that God is all-knowing and absolutely right in everything He does. Could God have kept everything, and I mean everything, that happen leading up to this, during this, and even after this trial time from happening? YES!! But, in His great wisdom and knowledge He did allow this to happen. He not only allowed the “little” things to happen, but also the big, more life changing things to happen.

Knowing that God allows all things in His time is a hard pill to swallow at times like these. Knowing it and believing it are two different things however. I have grown up in a world where we were taught Romans 8:28, but to see it exemplified in the lives of my family is nothing that could ever be described. One of the hardest things to do in life is to watch the people you love suffer. So that suffering, in and of itself, has been very hard, but I have seen great faith examples in my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, pastors and even strangers.

Another very important lesson I learned during these days was that of the blessing of friends. The Bible talks very clearly about friends. Friends are mentioned throughout the Bible in many different stages of life. Some friends are prayer warriors, some are encouragers, some are battle fighters, some lift our arms, some take us to Jesus, some challenge us, some help us see the sin in our life, some think the worst of us, some leave us, some breed bitterness in our hearts, some cheer us on while others tear us down, some are foolish, some are wise. We also have friends in many walks of their own spiritual life – some have been Christians for years, some are babies in Christ, some are even unbelievers while others still have believed, but are far from Christ. These friends all have something in common. They all mean something to us at one time or another. God has taught me that He can use people. That means me. I have been so deeply touched by the immense number of emails, contacts and notes I have received from friends. No, not everyone “agreed” with what I think, but they said they were praying for me. I even had people write me and say, “I don’t know you or your father, but I am praying for this whole matter to be resolved. I don’t know who is right, but God does, so I will pray.” What more could I ask for? Prayer is the greatest gift God gives to us. How awesome is it when someone says they are praying for us. When a person tells me they are praying for me they are saying they are placing me in the hands of our great Creator, Savior, and the Father that is in total control of our lives! Wow – pray for one another daily.

A direct line to God; the next lesson I learned. I had peers that came and helped me along the way. I had a family that was hurting just as I was, yet there were times that neither of those wonderful things mattered. There were times when the only thing that comforted was prayer. Prayer is more than just words; it’s calm in a storm. When man can do nothing God can do everything. I could not add further to the burdens already on heavy hearts. It was then, that I turned to my Heavenly Father who wrapped me in His arms and said, “My grace is sufficient.”

Sufficiency, the last lesson I will share. My all in all. Though family and friends have been a tremendous help, most of all, God has given me Himself. God is more than just salvation. He is my All, my Comfort, my Guide, my Hightower, my Fortress, my Strength, my Rock, my Abba Father, my Confidence, my Foundation, my Help, my Encouragement, my Friend, my Refuge, my Most High, my Confidant, my Everlasting. I could go on and on, but one little word says it – ALL. Without Him I am nothing.

There are many more things that I have learned through this trial, but I don’t have time to tell you of everything. If I were to sum this whole matter up I would say – God knows all, He does what not only is right for me, but what is best, and He is all I need.

No More tears...

Two months ago today I wrote concerning my dad’s leaving Maranatha. So much has changed since that time. I know there are not that many people that read this blog, but I’m still going to preface it with this statement. What I’m about to say comes from a very wounded heart and technically a biased opinion, so if you are tired of hearing about this whole situation, don’t care what I have to say, are on the side of the board or just don’t think what I might say is true, please stop reading now. What I am about to write comes from my heart and I’m sure will come across as very biased and maybe to some, wrong, but this is my blog so I’m going to say what I want to say and don’t read it if you’re not interested.

Many of you are going to hear many things in the next few days. There is a letter being sent out by the board. Not everything in this letter is true, but not everything in this letter is false. Yes, there were allegations made against my dad. I believe my dad. Period. These women have no reputation and are known by no one in our “circles”. My dad has been in fulltime ministry for 30 plus years. He has been faithful with his time, service, and finances. He has given 210% of everything he has. Yet, when it comes down to there are people that are going to take the word of these four HORRIBLE women that have no reputation over that of my dad’s.

Another thing that is being said is that my dad refused counseling. That is totally false. He went to counseling and this counseling cost him greatly. It cost him being away from his family for his birthday as well as Father’s Day and it cost him not being home to celebrate with his son on his engagement. So don’t you DARE tell me that he refused counseling. I’m still waiting to give him his birthday present until he can actually care again because of that counseling.

Third, and last, has anyone ever heard of restitution? The last time I looked in my Bible God still forgives. What these women said isn’t true, but if it were, isn’t my dad the one that needs encourage, Christian fellowship, comfort, guidance, help and love not to be taken out to the curb like the evening trash? How dare the people of God throw away their own. Are you telling me that you’ve never made a mistake? I didn’t know God made any perfect people!!! I sure would like to meet them.

I’ll be the first to admit I’m hurt, bruised and even angry. Yes, I’m angry at the situation. Hurt by the board, yes I’m angry at these women, but most of all I’m disappointed that man thinks he has the right to judge. God is the only one who knows every detail of this whole scandal (yes, that’s what I call it, a Baptist scandal) so should it not be God that deals with my dad and his ministry. I pray that God do a mighty work in someone life – my dad’s, the people involved in this or both, because nothing scares me more than thinking that man is in control of the future.

I can’t cry another tear. My heart breaks for my father. I love him more than life. My heart breaks for Maranatha the school. I love the students and faculty. My heart breaks because I’m afraid that my generation will grow up and rebel because man has taken things into their own hands and left God out of the picture.

I cry no more because I’ve cried all my tears away. I cry no more, because God can still do great things. I cry no more, because it hurts far deeper than tears can help. I cry no more because I know MY God is still righteous and He will do right by us even if that means pain from man for many days to come. Man many not care about us, but God loves me more than I even understand. Yes, I weep for my father, but Jesus wept for us because He loves us more than we will ever understand. There are no more tears because Jesus still cares for us.

**Please take time to read my most recent blog on the situation and how God is using this trial in my life.

Top ten...

Top Ten Reasons I'm glad I'm teaching first grade in the fall - not preschool!
10. First graders can all write their name
9. First graders can all tie their shoe (seriously - that's a test in Kindergarten)
8. First graders can talk
7. First graders can sit for more than ten seconds (or at least they are supposed to)
6. First graders can color in the lines for the most part
5. First graders are allowd to have scissors
4. First graders can be trusted to take a note to the office without eating the paper on the way
3. First graders can put their own cloths on
2. First graders can go to the bathroom by themselves
1. First graders do not wear diapers!!!!!

Abide with Me...

I need Thy presence every passing hour.
What but Thy grace can foil the tempter's power?
Who, like Thyself, my guide and stay can be?
Through cloud and sunshine, Lord, abide with me.

These are the words to the second verse of the song Abide with Me, written by Henry F. Lyte. I sang these words for two-and-a-half awesome years in Maranatha's Chamber Singer Choir!! I loved being in choir and as much of a blessing as those words were then, they are even more so now. I'm working about 70 hours a week, trying to pack up not only my room, but our entire house, and trusting in God's strength more and more each and every day. I was driving home from work tonight, listening to the Chamber's CD and the words to this song were such a blessing to my heart.

It's summer time. We're all busy working, playing, and trying to catch up on a million things we don't get done during the school. But God still leads and guides if we let him during these busy days.